


Friendly Advice

by Saria118



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-16
Updated: 2019-01-16
Packaged: 2019-10-11 00:06:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17436080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saria118/pseuds/Saria118
Summary: After the events of Tresspasser Lavellan needs some advice and Hawke is the only person she can go to.





	Friendly Advice

Kirkwall was a lot more impressive looking than Varric made it out to be. Then again the dwarf did have a strange affection for the run down and grimy. Or maybe the repairs done to the city were more expansive than the Inquisitor thought. Either way the city really did live up to the name of the white city now and it left Lavellan in awe once she set foot ashore.

“Move it elf!” A sailor shouted pushing her small body aside as he went to his work. Perhaps another day she would have set the offenders pants aflame but today she found the disregard rather comforting. After so long of strangers knowing her name and looking at her like a messiah it was nice to be anonymous once more. Maybe this trip to the Free Marches would last longer than she’d intended.

After all here she wasn’t the leader of the inquisition trying desperately to keep what semblance of a life she had together, just an amputee elf wandering a city.

With each step Lavellan happily updated the map in her mind that Varric has painted her. It hardly felt like this was her first visit, rather a local coming home. She made a note to tell him as such once her task was done.

Tentatively she stood at her goal and pondered if this was right. The information given said he’d be here but perhaps she ought to have gone to Varric first. In the end she’d only met the man once. But then she didn’t want anyone knowing just why she was here. They meant well but her life wasn’t some story they all had to rub their noses in. Then again, wasn’t she doing the same to him? But who else could she speak with? Who else could understand?

With a sure hand Lavellan knocked on the heavy door of the Hightown mansion. The owner coming out shortly after to her surprise.

“Hawke!” Lavellan has expected a servant not the Champion himself in what she could only assume was his sleepwear. “I um you probably don’t remember me.”

“Hard to forget someone you almost died in the fade with.” The Champion joked with that charming smile only he could wear.

“Yes I suppose so.” She laughed in return.

“Well don’t just stand there come in.” Hawke offered moving out of the doorway.

The inside of Hawkes home was both incredibly large and strangely homey. It didn’t suit the man but he seemed to try and make it his home regardless.

“So what brings you to my neck of the woods?” He asked offering her a comfy looking chair by the long dead fire. “Visiting Varric?” Lavellan took his offer settling in nicely.

“I will eventually.” She informed the man as he seated himself into the chair across from her. “But actually I came here to see you.”

“Don’t tell me the worlds going to shit again.” He sighed and only now did she notice the grey starting to flick into his dark hair.

“No no....well not yet..” In Truth Lavellan couldn’t really say definitely anything on the topic. “I am going to assume Varric has informed you on well...” she gestured to her missing arm, an attempt at a smile on her face.

“Yes He has.” Hawke replies returning her sad smile. Of course Varric told him, Lavellan had a feeling there was little their mutual friend didn’t share with the champion. “So you aren’t here to break me out of retirement?” He jokes and she knows it’s his way of easing the tension.

“Not yet.” She smiles tapping her remaining Fingers on her thigh in thought. “I just needed to talk to someone...”

“Long way to go for a talk.” He replies after a long moment of pause.

“Well there are so few people who can understand the situation and even less who can relate....” she replies with a sad laugh and that’s all Hawke needs.

“I see...” He stands and it confuses Lavellan, he motions for her to sit as he departs for a side room.

Silently the elf takes in the room more closely as she waits. Amongst the very Ferelden furniture she spots some very dalish odds and ends, a bookcase that appears to exclusively filled with Varric’s serials, some lovely daggers she recognizes as tevinter in origin, a variety of maps framed lovingly on the walls, along with the shield of a Templar that appears to have never been cleaned. Each object practically oozing the essence of one of Hawkes companions. Yet the most curious of all a simple pillow resting in the corner of a window.

“Here we’ll need these.” Hawke announces dragging Lavellan out of her thoughts on the origin of the pillow, to see him presenting her with two large wine bottles.

“Oh no I couldn’t possibly...” she tries politely to wave the bottle away but Hawke simply uncorks one and hands it to her.

“Trust me we’ll need these.” He replies simply to uncork his own taking a long swig before sitting back down. Uncomfortably the elf looks down at the bottle given to her, they weren’t sharing the bottle? “Ahhhh don’t tell but Aveline really has the best tastes when it comes to these.” He laughs.

With a shaky smile she brings the bottle to her lips and finds him right, the drink is oddly sweet with little burn but still makes her head feel fuzzy but in a good way.

“Just so you know I don’t normally partake during the day.” She laughs and oh does it feel so good to laugh.

“Neither do I but it helps keep the hurt away...” Hawke replies and he suddenly looks so much older and wiser. “So why don’t you start at the beginning?”

“I thought Varric told you everything?” Lavellan retorts with a smirk yet Hawke only wears a kind smile on his bearded face.

“He did but I think you’d like to tell this yourself.”

“I would...”

The hours pass quickly as she recounts her tale and she finds Hawke was indeed right the wine helps with the hurt. Makes it feel distant like she’s not even talking about herself.

“Then he just leaves! The asshole takes me to a beautiful place late at night, removes my markings which by the way I was very proud of!” Her voice slurs a bit as she recounts the night but Hawke takes it in stride.

“They are nice Merrill is always fond of hers.”

“Right!!” Sometimes Lavellan finds her reflection foreign without them. “But regardless, he kisses me and oh he was a good kisser but then he just leaves me there! At least you got to have sex with Anders....” She sighs at the memory drinking from her now half empty bottle.

“I’m not sure it’s better, I now have something to miss late at night....all alone.” And he too drinks.

They go on like this until the sun sets and Hawke has had to find more wine at least once. Lavellan finds it funny in a way, they hardly know each other and yet here they are talking about things she’d never dare say to her closest friends.

“I can’t stand the looks I get.” She mutters half into her bottle yet Hawke still hears offering her a “hmm?” In response. “It’s this odd mix of pity and shame....as though I ought to have known.....or I’m some naive child who didn’t know better...maybe they’re right... but the won’t bloody say it to me!” And somehow that hurts more.

“Well at least Solas didn’t flat out say to your face he’d break your heart.” Hawke sighed before breaking into laughter. “I just thought he was playing hard to get, what an idiot I am!”

“At least Anders was honest on what he was.” Lavellan pouted, “Practically everything Solas said to me was a lie in one way or another.”

“True but then when he did lie.... I wanted it so desperately to be the truth I ignored all the signs until it was too late.” There was such sadness in his voice that Lavellan could tell there was something he wasn’t saying and she understood that. It’s why she came her to see the only person who’d been hurt like she had.

“Things worked out though.....in a roundabout why.”

“Maybe.....but I doubt I’ll see him again, he’s very good at martyring himself.”

“Might not matter though if Solas has it his way...”

“I suppose you have me beat there.” He laughs and suddenly Lavellan can’t help but join him.

“I’m glad I came it feels good talking to someone who understands...” she’d been so worried before but now it felt right to let it all out.

“I’m glad as well been awhile to speak about Anders so freely.” He does look truly at peace now and it makes her feel all the better.

But things can’t stay this way.

“I don’t know if I can do it though.” She sighs taking the last drink from her bottle. Silence overtakes the room at her confession, the greatest secret the Inquisitor has, that she kept from everyone. “I know I have to try but when the moment comes I’m not sure....”

“Not sure you’ll be enough.” Hawke finishes for her and she nods, because of course he knows he’s the only person who really could.

“I know I shouldn’t but..... I still love him. As stupid as that sounds.” Her voice chokes out the words, words she could never say until just now.

“It’s not stupid.” He reassures her and before she notices she feels his hand on her head. It moves in a soothing way back and forth, only now recalling how he was and elder brother once, the elf couldn’t help but lean into the offered comfort.

“We don’t choose who we love.” And that simple statement broke her as she clung to the champions embrace. Suddenly all the tears and sorrow she had been pushing back, hiding from everyone because she had to be strong flowed out of her. All the while Hawke held her securely in his warm embrace and Lavellan swore she heard him cry too.

They fell asleep like that, both too tired from drink and emotions to move. It was the best nights sleep either had in ages.

“Thank you, Hawke. For listening and everything else.” She smiled, she might look a right mess but a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

“I feel I should thank you as well.” He laughed and it was just so infectious. “So what now?” There was concern in his hazel eyes, and it was an odd comfort.

“Now I go visit Varric, and then I think I’ll see the alienage...” Lavellan smiled lightly trying to quell his concerns. “I want to try to save Solas though, I’m not sure I can but I want to try.” She gripped her simple bag tighter in resolve.

“Well I wish you luck but....care for some friendly advice?” Though he smiled the inquisitor could see a deep pain in his eyes, from what she couldn’t be entirely sure. But she was certain it had to do with Anders.

“Of course.” After all who better than him?

“You can’t save someone if they don’t think they need saving. I know from experience.” His deep voice took on a serious tone she’d only ever heard when speaking of corypheus. It was jarring to say the least.

“Thank you. I’ll take it to heart.”


End file.
